The Emotional Side of Baby Gender Prediction


It’s happened to many couples: you start a family, become pregnant, and have a child. That child is the most precious thing in your world, no matter whether it’s a boy or a girl. As time goes on, you decide to have another child. This time, you’re hoping for the opposite. If you have a boy, you want to add a girl to the family, or if you have a girl, you want to add a boy.

When you get to that 20-week ultrasound appointment, you can’t wait to hear which it will be. When you find out it’s the same as your other child, your heart sinks a little bit.

Sure, you’re still happy to be pregnant. Yes, you’re going to love that second child just as much as you love your first child. Still, you sometimes wish you could have one of each.

By the time you get to the third child, you really start thinking hard about gender. You do some reading, and find out that having sex at certain times and in certain ways might maximize your odds of conceiving one gender or the other.

So, you try – and you fail. Baby number three, while precious, is the same gender as the other two.

There’s nothing wrong with feeling disappointment. It’s normal and natural. It doesn’t make you a bad parent. It doesn’t mean you’re going to resent the child because they’re not the gender you hoped for.

What it does mean is that you probably need to talk through these feelings. Your partner is a good place to start, but he’s probably feeling some of the same emotions. You might even think about talking to a therapist, as it can be a difficult time.

You need to learn to accept the emotions that come. Don’t feel guilty at sadness or disappointment. But instead you need to bring yourself to the point of acceptance, and remember just how much you truly love your other children. Having one more boy or one more girl isn’t going to change that.